For years, I lived by an unsustainable mantra: "Two more deals."
That phrase became such a running joke in my family that I can still hear my wife and kids saying it in my voice whenever I’d interrupt family time to take a call. Just one more email. Just one more call. Just two more deals.
It wasn't until I found myself completely disconnected from the moments that mattered most that I realized what I was missing out on.
The Pressure To Be Everywhere
FOMO—fear of missing out—has become part of our vocabulary because it describes something nearly universal. We all want to fit in, excel, and please those around us. As entrepreneurs and leaders, we're bombarded with messages about hustling harder, sleeping less, and maximizing every second.
I used to wear my availability like a badge of honor. Being accessible 24/7 meant I was dedicated, right? What I didn't realize was that by trying to be present everywhere, I wasn't fully present anywhere.
In episode 19, Doug and I tackled this head-on. That constant pull to be everywhere, see everything, and never miss an opportunity is more than exhausting; it's impossible.
We've both learned that as you get more comfortable with yourself, you also get more comfortable with your own decisions.
Watch Doug and I discuss how you should ‘miss out’ without the fear and self-judgment that used to come with it.
The Turning Point
The wake-up call came when my daughter looked at me during a family dinner and said, "Dad, are you even listening?" I had been nodding along while scrolling through emails on my phone. The truth was, I hadn't heard a word she said.
That moment hit me hard. I was physically at the table but mentally in my inbox. My drive to provide and succeed had created a disconnect between what I valued most—my family—and how I was spending my time and attention.
Discovering JOMO
The joy of missing out isn't about becoming a hermit or abandoning ambition. It's about making intentional choices about where your energy goes instead of being pulled in every direction.
For me, JOMO started with small changes:
- Set digital boundaries: Turn off email notifications from 5 PM to 8 AM. The world doesn't end if I respond tomorrow.
- Be honest about capacity: Learn to say "I can't commit to that right now" instead of automatically saying yes.
- Value depth over breadth: Focus deeply on what matters most instead of spreading myself thin.
- Embrace silence: Create pockets of solitude where I can hear my thoughts.
The Business Case for JOMO
Here's what surprised me: becoming more selective about where I put my energy didn't hurt my business; it helped it. When I'm fully present in meetings instead of half-listening while thinking about three other things, I make better decisions. When I take time to disconnect and recharge, I return with clearer thinking and a fresh perspective.
At Fluent Conveyors, we've built this philosophy into our culture. We encourage our team to work hard but also disconnect when they're off. No midnight emails, no expectation of round-the-clock availability.
We've also learned that always being 'on' doesn't lead to better performance; it leads to burnout. As we explored in episode 17, allocating your energy intentionally throughout the day helps you show up as your best self at work, at home, and for yourself. You can't be everything to everyone all the time.
Family First, Finally
The most profound impact has been at home. When I put my phone away and engage fully with my kids, I've discovered conversations and moments I would have completely missed before. I've learned about their struggles, their triumphs, and their daily lives in ways that would never have happened if I'd kept one eye on my notifications.
My wife noticed the change before anyone else. "You're actually here now," she told me one evening. Simple words, but they meant everything.
In episode 9, Doug and I discussed the importance of being fully present instead of being 50% in multiple places. The quality of those moments matters more than the quantity. Instead of being 100% at work and only 30% with my family, I'm learning to balance my energy better between work and home.
Jeremy and I discuss how important it is to balance work and personal life at 23:00.
Cultivating JOMO in Your Life
If you're caught in the FOMO cycle, here are some starting points for finding joy in missing out:
- Audit your time: Where are you physically present but mentally absent? Start there.
- Create technology-free zones: Designate spaces (like the dinner table) and times that are device-free.
- Practice saying no: Remember that saying no to one thing means saying yes to something else.
- Start small: You don't have to overhaul your life overnight. Begin with one meeting-free afternoon or one device-free evening per week.
The Real Definition of Success
I used to think success meant never missing an opportunity. Now, I understand that true success is being present for the opportunities that align with what matters most to me: building a business I'm proud of while being the husband and father my family deserves.
Sometimes, that means missing out on a potential deal. Sometimes, it means declining an invitation. And I've discovered there's genuine joy in those choices when they're made deliberately, in service of what I value most.
The funny thing about JOMO? When you embrace it, you realize you weren't missing out on anything important after all. You were just finally tuning in to what matters.
Jeremy Axel is the co-host of the Never in Reverse podcast with Doug Cox. His journey from "two more deals" to present leadership has shaped his approach to business, family, and life.
